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Stop Masturbating Online and Help Save Your Mortgage
It may sound ridiculous that you could lose your home to online porn addiction. But successful people know how these things work. You might sacrifice an important meeting to rearrange your schedule so you can access porn that day. Or, you can postpone an important work or bank phone call you need to make, because you want to stay on the line a bit longer while you search for new porn – and then the person you need to contact may be gone by the time you get around to call. Maybe you can’t call the next day, then maybe the person is away the next day, then suddenly you see a whole week go by. These things happen, and they happen in very small slips and follies. But then they add up to derailments in your life.
So let’s say your job isn’t as secure as it used to be, and so maybe your ability to pay your mortgage is precarious, and on top of that, you like logging on to porn sites whenever you can for 1, 2, or even 3 hours per session. Your porn habit is essentially pushing you toward failure, even though it can help you feel better day-to-day, hour-to-hour (as all addictions do). So how can you stop it and turn things around before it’s too late?
First of all, don’t try to stop masturbating online. It’s a waste of time. You should start small and expect many, many setbacks. Quickly assess how much time you’re currently wasting online. An hour or two online each day might seem reasonable enough, and you can probably still function most of the time in the world. But think about it: even just one hour a day, five days a week, that’s at least 5 hours a week, or about 20 hours a month. That’s half a work week every month you spend staring at pixels on a screen, eroding your self-esteem, when you could be applying those 20 hours to boosting your self-esteem and improving your standing in the world. . Over the course of a year, these 20 hours per week represent at least 240 hours per year. Those six full, wasted, thrown away weeks of work. It’s been a full six weeks since you’ve spent holding yourself back, instead of building yourself up. At the very least, you could have spent that time doing some sort of lasting hobby like taking a vacation, or taking a class, or even writing a book or going out and meeting real people.
Make a list of things you wish you had done instead of logging on to watch porn. Plug that wishlist into how much time you waste online (say, six weeks out of every year). Then, day by day, work to avoid masturbation instead of working to line up opportunities to masturbate. Put yourself in situations where you need to be somewhere where you know you will have access to a porn-ready computer. Go out and see people. Get involved in groups that volunteer, play sports, hunt, make art, or do whatever interests you. Strive to get out and see others. When you slip, you slip. Let it go and move on. As you replace the damaging behavior of masturbating for hours online with the reinforcing behavior of interacting with people and looking for things that really make you happy and stronger, the urge to connect looking for new porn will slowly decrease. You will become stronger. It will be less appealing to you. And before you know it, you’ll find that you’ve changed your life in a positive direction slowly over time, instead of falling headlong into failure slowly over time.
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