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Be Smart About Higher Education: 5 Steps to Determine When and How You Begin Change
Change can involve excitement and be seen as a great opportunity or be scary and the worst thing that can happen. Whether it is a good or a bad experience depends on a person’s attitude. However it is experienced, normalizing change is the path to a fulfilling life.
A baby’s first steps are fragile, but eventually fail. Going from middle school to high school for the first time is something to look forward to, but students in the upper grades can be intimidating. Leaving home to go to college means freedom and independence, but also the risk of homesickness, bullying with arrogant professors and difficult roommates. The first day of the first real job is the start of a new chapter in life, but feeling totally stupid is common.
The aforementioned experiences are a common path for students pursuing higher education. Real change starts with hard choices. Once in high school, will the student respond appropriately or react negatively to bullies and gossip? Are the challenges of pursuing higher education addressed rather than avoided or denied? Does fear of asking questions and false pride dictate how the new job unfolds?
Difficult choices continue throughout life. Mel Robbins, author of The 5 second rule credits that personal recovery from bankruptcy and excessive drinking began with a 5-4-3-2-1 countdown process for launch out of bed in the morning. The story is mostly about a desperate need to change direction in one’s life by ignoring feelings and committing to taking action to improve oneself. Mel claims the seemingly insignificant process of counting 5-4-3-2-1 and launch getting out of bed instead of hitting the snooze button started the road to recovery that led to being one of the best speakers in the world.
The key to Mel’s success is being smart about what needs to be done and taking action to get it done by not giving in to what’s comfortable. Another one Bad boy is analysis paralysis that involves too much thinking, which eventually stops you from doing anything. Although research varies, many would agree that it takes at least 21 days to form a habit. The time before creating a habit is difficult because change is a challenge! Failed New Year’s resolutions are permanent proof of this.
A support Bad boy on analysis the paralysis is a cognitive distortion. Cognitive distortions are simply ways in which the mind convinces itself of something that is not really true. Inaccurate thoughts reinforce negative thinking. The tricky part is that a rationale is built around the misconceptions. Here are some common distortions people use:
Pessimism – amplifying the negative while filtering out the positive.
Helplessness – feeling helpless in the face of what is happening in life.
Overgeneralization – basing an opinion on a single piece of evidence.
Blame – “it’s not my fault, you don’t understand.”
Emotional reasoning – feelings automatically tell what is true.
Attempts to change are unlikely with dominant cognitive distortions. This is why the 5 second rule is so effective in carrying out a predetermined decision. The only thing to think about is repeating the 5 second countdown to action. Distortions based on feelings or thinking should be ignored.
Answering five questions serves as additional help in determining when and how to change:
Where are you? Take an honest and objective look at your physical, emotional, relationship, mental (academic), spiritual and financial status.
Where are you going and why? Write down your dreams and get a vision and a goal to stay focused.
Who are you? Know that each person is talented, gifted and destined for great things. The hardest person to convince is you.
What are you doing important? Pay it forward.
When and how will you initiate the changes needed to be smart about higher education and live a life that matters?
Start using the 5 second rule: 5-4-3-2-1, start answering these questions now!
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